Monologue of a Gaay in the city

Not so long time ago, when I was in School…Ahem…I made a choice of taking Sindhi as my third language, well it was not much a choice but I was born with it, moreover I had realised that I was bad with languages so clearly took the easiest available option, or I thought so “My Mother-tongue”. Just before the class use to start, we had to introduce ourselves.

Pooja Motwani stands up & introduces herself “Hi!” (Uncomfortably looks at every one & continues) “I know you will be surprised but I am Sindhi, tough I look Punju na?” Mr. Bhavnani tells her to sit & comments “you should be proud of what you are, you are Sindhi & that’s what you are” & he looks directly at me, I knew it was my turn to introduce thyself & before I could start he comments “U look like a Madrasi”, I knew I was not the contemporary looking fair-fat-flashy Sindhi with a surname ending with “ni” but he went way too far with that comment , the whole class started laughing, it did make me uncomfortable, but I answer back looking directly at him clearly indicating I didn’t like his statement of opinion “Fortunately, Sindhi… that’s what I am” I said. From that day onwards I was in bad books of Mr. Bhavnani.

Now let me drop the second shoe, Vinay a 25yr old guy looks directly at Ken & says “Do I look gay” Ken looks at him up & down, just then Rumi comments “Honey! The aliens sitting on Mars & looking at earth are pointing at you & saying GAY- GAY- GAY” we all burst into laughter at a Dhaba near Oshiwara police stn. Just then Deepak a 24 yr old muscular chap with strong jaw line originally from Delhi comes & joins the table (he was Ken’s friend) & Vinay was just checking him out (leeching-right word). So over beer we introduce ourselves to Deepak & when Vinay’s turn comes he says “hey I am Vinay, I am SINGLE & Gay too” & over a handshake they exchange smiles too. Rumi & I exchange a smirk over Vinay’s introduction. In my mind it reminded me of Pooja where she use to always try & be in complete denial of her Sindhiness but when it came to admission in one of the privileged colleges in the city handled by a Sindhi trusts, she not only wrote her mother tongues as Sindhi on the application form but at the top in Bold capital letters wrote S I N D H I to get a preference. That night a thought was just running in my head, is gay community any similar to the Sindhi community?

When it came to GB parties we will have herds of gay guys coming, wearing their trendiest clothes, waiting to be approached or approach, be seen & see, but talk about a pride parade some of them will either refuse or come but wear a mask. If it works for us we wrap the gay blanket & if it’s for a cause we throw that blanket back to the closet & enter the closet too. When will gays be gay & Sindhi’s be Sindhi. We have guys creating two profiles on Facebook, Orkut & say “One is my gay profile & the other is straight, so please don’t write gay comments on my straight profile”. WHY?

Other striking resemblance is the way Sindhi & gay characters are portrayed in Bollywood. Suketu Mehta in his book Maximum City had said that Mumbai is the city of extremes, but in our movies we are just over the top forget extreme, when it comes to characterization of gay guys & they will add nothing but comedy, the same is for Sindhi Characters they will always be shown people who wear really glittery clothes & bad dressing sense . I do accept that we do wear glittery clothes but good ones very Manish Malhotra types and I also know an aunt who wears Armani & Tiffany & flaunts it in marriages, which use to confuse my poor grand mom as she couldn’t understand where ArmaNI & TiffaNI hailed from in Sindh. She thought Armani was some tailor in Chembur camp & Tiffani’s was jewellery store in Bandra just next to Notandas & Sons, cause “if it’s NI it’s definitely Sindhi”.